Earlier today, I was looking at my WordPress Dashboard and noticed a then-recently posted article “Why I will never have a girlfriend…” This sounded very depressing, but I felt I could relate, so I went to the article. It linked to a PDF that gave a mathematical calculation of why the author could never have a girlfriend. Much of the math was more complex than I understood, but the end result gave me a good laugh. You can read it here
Please understand that the article is dated (pun not intended!!!), but I have to add on that it might be statistically more-possible for me to find that one who could one day, for the rest of our lives, be my beloved bride.
Tristan Miller says:
Lest anyone suspect that my standards for women are too high, let me allay those fears by enumerating in advance my three criteria for the match. First, the potential girlfriend must be approximately my age—let’s say 21 plus or minus three or four years. Second, the girl must be beautiful (and I use that term all encompassingly to refer to both inner and outer beauty). Third, she must also be reasonably intelligent—she doesn’t have to be Mensa material, but the ability to carry on a witty, insightful argument would be nice.
Now I would have to add to and change some of the criteria:
- Age: reasonably close=25 +/- a few years (not more than five)
- Added criteria: A good, solid, Bible-believing Christian (possible translation: fundamental, Baptist/baptistic)
At the end of the statistical analysis, Mr. Miller ends up with a whopping 18,726 “potential choices.” He concludes that he would have to date for nearly 67 years to find “the one.”
Now, remember, I have an added criteria that would further narrow this field, which would probably cut at least in half, so we’ll say at most, 9,363 “possibilities” exist for me. I know, there are poor theological implications in the previous statement (more than one will of God, etc…), but follow this through. Of the 9,363 “potential ones” exists the one (thereby correcting to one will of God). Assuming the same “rate of date” in said article, I would be going for 33.5865384 years. So, let’s see….I’ll be 59.5032051 years old at the end of my quest! All this to say: good thing statistics don’t control my (in)ability to get married! And for the record, I’m still searching 😉 .
I just got to thinking I should further break this down. From the 9,363 “possibilities,” I should deduct presumably half to account for those who are “already taken.” That leaves me with 4,682 (rounded up since I don’t want to go out with one-half of a woman). To account for lack of mutual interest, I should deduct another 50%, leaving 2,341. This makes married life much more statistically-possible with only a 8.3966346 year search, putting me at just over 34 years old at the end of my quest. Again, good thing statistics don’t control my (in)ability to get married! And for the record, I’m still searching 😉